Tour de Langue

Huge crowds follow the Tour de France; some of them, of course, have no choice because the roads are closed and they can't go anywhere.
— Phil Liggett

Since he had that tetanus injection he hasn't been able to find his legs.
— Phil Liggett

He was wiped out in sight of the finish.
— Phil Liggett

When they literally hit the wall, they're going to lose some time.
— Phil Liggett

They tried this on the slopes of the Alps and they destroyed themselves — so they need to be careful.
— Phil Liggett

The computer's running around like a very busy machine here today.
— Phil Liggett

There's some serious ravaging going on at the head of the field.
— Paul Sherwen

He would not assassinate his squad unless he thought he had a good chance of winning the race.
— Paul Sherwen

I think that's what they'll do: they'll asphyxiate a lot of guys.
— Paul Sherwen

He was an integral part of assassinating the field.
— Paul Sherwen

These roads are Belgian roads and they're always dangerous.
— Paul Sherwen

If Moreau goes for that, he will be tickling the back end of Chartreau for the King Of The Mountain competition.
— Paul Sherwen

If I were in this leading group, I would feel a little bit of trepidation creeping into my morale.
— Paul Sherwen

You can see a lot of enthusiasm being dished out into the pace–making.
— Paul Sherwen

The first part of this race was inundated by very high temperatures.
— Paul Sherwen

The time trial will smile to his advantage.
— Paul Sherwen

He's eating across this gap.
— Paul Sherwen

France is the centre of Europe.
— Paul Sherwen

We're in the middle of nowhere, we're in the middle of France.
— Paul Sherwen

They have their own form of language in this region, the Gascon language, which is half between Spanish and half between Basque.
— Paul Sherwen

Isn't it amazing how coincidences happen?!
— Paul Sherwen

Isn't fate a funny thing?!
— Paul Sherwen

Thirst Quenching

Science is not only compatible with spirituality; it is a profound source of spirituality.
— Carl Sagan 'The Demon-Haunted World'

Myth

… whenever a myth has been taken literally its sense has been perverted; but also, reciprocally, … whenever it has been dismissed as a mere priestly fraud or sign of inferior intelligence, truth has slipped out the other door.
— Joseph Campbell

Warning Girls Through Metaphor

The folk tale 'Pinocchio' can be read as allegorical for the inverse correlation of male truthfulness with male sexual arousal.

Tourist Anagram

Shock The Monkey

All bridges burning behind me,
all safety beyond reach ...
the monkey feels his chains out blindly,
only to find himself released.
— Peter Hammill 'La Rossa'

The Criminal Mind

Frank Sinatra's favourite Lennon & McCartney song was 'Something' by George Harrison.

Spin

Well, that's like hypnotising chickens.
— Iggy Pop 'Lust For Life'

The Dispossessed

We carry in our hearts the true country
And that cannot be stolen
We follow in the steps of our ancestry
And that cannot be broken
— Midnight Oil 'Dead Heart'

Sense Of Place

And I was green, greener than the hill
Where flowers grew and sun shone still
Now I’m darker than the deepest sea
Just hand me down, give me a place to be
— Nick Drake 'Place To Be'

Hola!

Ól é!
is Irish for
'Drink it!'

Botanical Anagram

Disappearing Nuances

Envy: wanting what someone else has
Jealousy: not wanting someone else to have what you have

Alternate: every other one
Alternative: another

Sects Anagram

Unsurprising Anagram

L'Étranger

Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence.
— Ambrose Bierce

Boofheadism

When do jingoism and patriotism tip over into boofheaded nationalism, elitism, or worse, racism?
— Doug Anderson

Town Planning

Rome wasn't built in a day — it just looks that way.
— Doug Anderson

Football

A competition involving the attempt to score/fertilise goals/eggs with a ball/sperm propelled by humans.

Admirror

Admiration, n. Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.
— Ambrose Bierce

Should Auld Acquaintance Be Forgot?

Acquaintance. A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.
— Ambrose Bierce

Mixed Metaphunction

Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion.
— Ambrose Bierce

Semiotics Anagram

A Gender Not Hidden

Every man for himself.
— Laurie Anderson 'Big Science'

He said: Isn't it. Isn't it just like a woman?
She said: It takes. It takes one. It takes on to. It takes one to know one.
He said: Isn't it just like a woman?
She said: She said it. She said it to no. She said it to no one.
— Laurie Anderson 'It Tango'

The Discovery Of North America

1492. As children we were taught to memorise this year with pride and joy as the year people began living full and imaginative lives on the continent of North America. Actually, people had been living full and imaginative lives on the continent of North America for hundreds of years before that. 1492 was simply the year sea pirates began to rob, cheat, and kill them.
— Kurt Vonnegut

Economics Anagram

The Three Arse

"Reeling and Writhing, of course, to begin with," the Mock Turtle replied; "and then the different branches of Arithmetic — Ambition, Distraction, Uglification, and Derision."
— Lewis Carroll 'Alice's Adventures in Wonderland'

Otherwisdom

Never imagine yourself not to be otherwise than what it might appear to others that what you were or might have been was not otherwise than what you had been would have appeared to them to be otherwise.
— Lewis Carroll 'Alice's Adventures in Wonderland'

Sound Sense

Take care of the sense, and the sounds will take care of themselves.
— Lewis Carroll 'Alice's Adventures in Wonderland'

Might Just As Well

"Then you should say what you mean," the March Hare went on.
"I do," Alice hastily replied; "at least — at least I mean what I say — that's the same thing, you know."
"Not the same thing a bit!' said the Hatter. "You might just as well say that 'I see what I eat' is the same thing as 'I eat what I see'!"
"You might just as well say," added the March Hare, "that 'I like what I get' is the same thing as 'I get what I like'!"
"You might just as well say," added the Dormouse, who seemed to be talking in his sleep, "that 'I breathe when I sleep' is the same thing as 'I sleep when I breathe'!"
— Lewis Carroll 'Alice's Adventures in Wonderland'

Mot Riddle

Why is a raven like a writing-desk?
 — Lewis Carroll 'Alice's Adventures in Wonderland'

(Because Poe wrote on both.)